I was 20 years old and a student too . And you may wonder, or it may sound disgusting, but the stalker was not an unknown person -- he was a lecturer from our college department. . All my coursemates and friends like him because of his fantastic personality. He is a married man but his wife isn't here. The way he dressed up and teaching was seriously nice. He was also one of the most respected people on campus -- even I respected him before I experienced his nonsensical behaviour.
Many things happened but I'm not gonna tell you all about it (because this page wont be enough for it... hahahhaha =p)
Only the highlighted one..=)
On my second year,he handled one of our subjects and by the end of that semester, I started encountering his unusual behaviour. He used to stare at me, give me a smile when I walked down the corridor or on campus, and he was constantly observing me.
For a few days I ignored it -- I thought I may be mistaken, but the situation got worse day by day. When we had classes , he would be there; he would sit opposite me and stare continuously. I started ignoring him and he would get angry, scolding some student or the other for some silly reason, in order to draw my attention and intimidate me.
Sometimes he talked in double meaning where I couldn't understand of what he is trying to say.
In the class he tend to tell everyone like why this girl (he mentioned my name) always kept silent and look liked a good girl?
And yeah of course always smiling??
First I thought it is a compliment from a lecturer to a student. Then the way he expresses, it was some kind weird on the next day. I was wondering???...why me??...
I used to sit on the front line in all classes. But after I experienced his different behaviour towards me, I tried not to sit at the front seat and sat at the 3rd line, in the middle of my friends. But again he starts. He asked me to sit infront, if not he couldn't give his lecture. Its not COULDN'T, its WON'T. He sounds like he is flirting with me and that was so awkward. All my classmates are shocked and turned to me just like Im the one who have to be blamed. Only my friends didnt support their view of point. I felt very embrassed.Having tough times like this in your whole life is a nightmare of hell!! I have no other choice. He wont handle or cont our class unless I've move my position to the infront seat. But still I'm brave enough to replied him back that "Im sorry but I would like to sit here and I'm comfortable with it ".... This time (ME) no more smiling at all. Only during his classes, I will be like some kind of stoned face. He still forced me. Omg!!.. I bite my lips and felt I'm like a slave or a helpless girl. I moved to infront seat. 'They' tend to talk behind me that I'm seducing him and that word was the most .... I couldn't imagine it. Oh grossus...!!!
Even after-that-day, I and my Chinese friend was on the way to campus library. Suddenly we met him as he was on his way to attend his meeting at outstation and yet he saw us. I really wana escape from him as I walked a bit faster but he called me."la, again get caught". I stopped, turned to him. He telling me that he is going to attend his meeting. Im wondering for awhile. So, what I supposed to do or say? and who cares? I buat blurr je. My Chinese friend is the one who was curious and asked him further questions but then he keep looking at me and replyiing to me.... I don't understand. I really wana say this. (Excuse me, its not me who are you are talking to. It's her and can you stop looking at me like that. It's damn annoying). "Answer her, you idiottt" I really thought of it bt never ever had an oppurtunity to voice it out. All I did is just thinking of it.. never ever have the guts to yell !!! After he left, she told me that she was so upset with his hillarious behaviour and she said those words to me" now I understood your situations and how you felt".
ME~> Glad u are...at last..
Things carried on the same way for nearly five months. I told one of my best friend but she said that he was playing with me. Playing???....There are a lot of girls out there. More prettier and more nicer. Why me??.. He is not playing. I know. Like what I've said in last post about the stalker. They usually look at other places and flirting crazily.
On the last lesson, I calmed myself and pray to GOD very well that today will be the end for everything. I entered into the classroom and as usual he stared at me and asked "so today how are you" and I thought for one minute should I layan him or just walk away. I said 'fine" and sit on the seat at the back (since my batch is only 13 of them and the classroom is quite large). After that everything was ok. The lesson was going as normal too. But then he suddenly ask me whether I'm pretending? I seriously hate that word. PRETENDING!!!.. I just kept my mouth shut and then he asked me about some new disease. I couldn't explained about it because that is the first time I've heard about it.
SO, I said a bit politely " I don't know sir" but then he continuously asking me same the question over again and again. Is he deaf?? I tried to control myself but I can't. Finally, I ended up with bursting out. I exploded like a volcano, I roared
"I said I don't know means I DON'T KNOW!!!... Got It..???"
Seriously, that was the first time I behaved like this. Everyone are shocked and yeah of course you should see his face. Damn scared!!! The room and the ppl was suddenly changed tremendously and getting their silence treatment instead. I cannot believe that I DID IT. I guess my voice raised in a way of suppressing anger and it echoed back it seems. Then he was like blurr "Errr, its ok, let me teach you. You can sit now".
After that, I couldn't concentrate in class anymore. But whatever it is, I have to be strong and I AM STRONG!! So, I was note down all the things he taught. Tears dropped... dropping... and still dropping.. No one knows it.Only the paper that I'm writing on it.. 'IT' knows very much.
After few minutes, he came to me and was standing very near to me. I buat tak tau je. He said "your handwriting is beautiful and neat". I keep quiet and did't even notice him. He gave everyone break for awhile and then he sat on the infront of my seat and keep looking... looking... looking and looking at me!!!
I couldn't stand it. Those awkward and disgusted moments. Tears dropped. It's been half and hour and still I'm looking in to the paper. He went away then. All I know is the ink of pen on the paper was being faded away...
That semester finished. But still on the next sem, I met him again coincidently. My friends are with me. I thought he might change a bit but he is not. Still the same. He asked me why I never ever come and visit him after the class and then he also asked the silly questions.... yuckkk annoying!!! "Did you forget me, aren't you'? And again my mouth was like zipped. Such a jerk!!! How dare you? (was thinking)
Since I'm at the lecturer's room, I controlled myself and tell him that "Sorry sir,I don't have time for that nor it's important for me". I walked away without waiting for his reply. Until now, I didn't see him at all. Thanks to GOD.
This is the second time I'm revealing my problem publicly. Actually its not a problem at all. It can be referred as one of my life experiences. Many girls experience this kind of situation and I hope I never face it ever again.
So my advice is, just ignore it and concentrate on your work. Stalkers want to do everything in a disguised way, they are scared to make things public. Now I'm 21, but at a young age everything seemed new and at that point in time, we can't take any step to confront them.
Be STRONG and BRAVE!!!!
*LOVE*
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